don’t you wish such place existed

They would be divided according to fandom. Crossover fics would appear in all the fandoms they reference. The smut section would have red lighting (for red light districts, duh) and the fluff section would have bean bags and stuffed animals. The angst section would be between fluff and smut so you can cope as you choose. There would be divisions according to pairings. Fan art would decorate the walls. There would be special nights for readings. The computers could be used to write fic and reference the original canon. Each fandom section would be decorated according to the corresponding fandom. The staff would wear cosplays from various fandoms.

*sobs quietly because this doesn’t exist*

There would be hot chocolate and cheetos and french fries and coffee available at all times; hot chocolate to sip in between sobs, cheetos and french fries to fill the emptiness you feel when you finish a truly great fanfic, and coffee to give you the caffeine you need to pull a reading all-nighter. There would be t-shirts available for the most-loved fanfictions. There would be hammocks and lofts and beds and couches and armchairs and blankets and pillows. It would not be an uncommon thing to spend the night tucked into a corner of this beautiful place. It would be a sanctuary.

*and the tears stream down my face*

Can there be a separate room with hungry hungry hippos and mortal kombat games for all those who are overwhelmed with anger at the shipping wars to get out their frustration?  (I’d rather not be in the middle of a fluff and suddenly a Wincest/Destiel fight breaks out.)

I’d never leave. 

I’m that creeper in the Johnlock section hissing at you when you try to be social with me.

there are no telephones and no one need ever talk. Except for when your heart is being ripped out by a particularly brutal angst fic and someone tentatively pats your back and hands you a tissue and whispers ‘it’s ok bro, breathe through it.’   
*sobs quietly* 

There would be a few members of staff specifically hired to hug the crying fangirls. And fics with major character death would be marked with warnings from other readers, and there would be a room to go to recover, and everything would have the right tags and trigger warnings.

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